Today a quote from a fictional character. A good one though….
Oven: An oven is a thermally insulated chamber used for the heating, baking or drying of a substance, and most commonly used for cooking. Kilns and furnaces are special-purpose ovens, used in pottery and metalworking, respectively.
Lately readers I have been tired. Oh so very tired. I think a year of broken sleep and just the mere fact that I have three adorable children and a husband to keep me busy, has finally caught up with me. I do stupid things like put glasses in the fridge, or forget where I have put things…constantly and it wasn’t too long ago that I forgot to turn the kitchen tap off and flooded the floor (which actually proved a good way to clean it!) Well, the other day my tiredness went to epic proportions and caused me to have an epic fail! If you follow me on Twitter then you might have seen me tweet about this particular incident. Here now is the sorry tale in full….
We are trying (and subsequently) failing to sell our house and have been for several months. A prospective buyer came up who was, for a change, actually quite promising and to cut a long story short I had to get the house tidy and cleaned and sorted in just two hours before they came for a viewing. Now, I don’t know what your house is like, but mine always looks lived in. (and that is putting it politely!) I swear my house vomits crap, everywhere, all of the time. No sooner have I tidied something away than I turn around and a whole heap of sh** has appeared in its place. There simply isn’t enough room in this house for the amount of tat we have. I’ve tried to declutter. I’ve tried to sort and put things into the millions of boxes I have bought in Ikea, but it just. doesn’t. work. So tidying and cleaning my house in two hours is no mean feat.
My youngest had gone down for his nap, middle child was at pre-school and eldest was at school so…I got started. Flinging toys into the playroom boxes and shoving clothes into cupboards I worked my way around my house like a whirlwind. (I still can’t find some of the things I tidied away that day, goodness only knows where I have put them) Upstairs was done and the last room to be sorted was the kitchen…and no, it was not a case of saving the best for last. My daughter had recently had an outdoor party for her birthday and I’d gone a bit mad in Asda buying plastic cutlery. So much cutlery in fact that it would not fit in any drawer, or cupboard. The slow cooker had already been put in the back of my car and this is probably where the cutlery should have been squirrelled away to as well. But no. I wasn’t that clever. I put the cutlery in…my oven (you can see where this is going can’t you?!) Not only did I shove the cutlery in the oven, but in also went a massive Tupperware box, my daughter’s pink baking mixing bowl and spatula and various other things that I couldn’t find a home for. I was just hoping they weren’t the kind of prospective buyers who wanted to look in the oven. Or in any of the cupboards for that matter lest they wanted to forever remain in my house buried under a pile of crap that would inevitably fall on them if they opened a cupboard door.
So, very pleased with myself for making my house look amazing in such a short space of time the first thing I did was text my husband to tell him not to use the oven when he got home. (Why I felt the need to do this is beyond me as the man wouldn’t even know how to turn it on, he does not cook!) Then, having neglected to clean myself at this point I hopped in the shower before evacuating the house with my youngest in time for the viewing to begin, still smiling that I’d done a great job. Ha pride comes before a fall yes!
So, later on that day, my children decided they would like jacket potatoes for dinner. I usually start the potatoes off in the microwave before moving them to the oven to finish them off and crisp up the skins. I switched the oven on and put three potatoes in the microwave before returning to the lounge to play with the children some more. When I went back into the kitchen to check on the potatoes I could smell something funny, and stupidly didn’t twig. I thought it was the potatoes and like a complete muppet even wondered why they smelt of burning plastic. I thought maybe a bit of the plastic bag they were stored in had made its way into the microwave. Yet I couldn’t find anything. Five minutes later and I went back in to find the smell had got stronger. Still, I didn’t twig. (remember when I said I was tired!) I inspected, no word of a lie, every potato for signs of plastic and obviously couldn’t find any. It was then, at the moment when I was walking past the oven snd back into the lounge, when I realised what was happening. In slow motion I reached for the oven switches and turned them off before opening the door shouting ‘nooooooooooooooooooo!’
Carnage. Absolute carnage. The plastic cutlery was all melted and fused together.
Oh the mess. The mess! The plastic had welded to the sides of the oven and dripped back down into the fan at the back. And the smell was horrendous, to think I had thought it was the potatoes! What an idiot!! I flung the back door open and turned on the extractor fan to try and get rid of the smell, which I’d now convinced myself was totally toxic and going to engulf the house. It took hours to finally go, by which point the melted plastic had solidified and I couldn’t get any of it out of the oven.
Have you ever baked anything you shouldn’t have? Please do tell me in the comments section below so I know I’m not the only tired fool out there x
I’ve decided to link this up with a brand new linky from @The_Doves all about photos telling a story. Technically you’re only supposed to use one photo, but I’m sure she won’t mind that I’ve used three!
The B&B was dated but perfectly comfortable. Looking out over the local beach the room was full of items from the sea. Dusty old shells, red and white striped lighthouses and a beautiful painting of a sandcastle sitting alone on a sandy shore. They’d really gone overboard on the seaside theme and it made Megan smile. It reminded her of her son’s bedroom; he loved the beach and every morning woke up asking if they could go.
“No!’ She suddenly said out loud, and quickly that thought was pushed to the very back of her mind. She mustn’t think about them, mustn’t remember what she’d put them through and why she was here, it was too raw, too painful.
Tears pricking her eyes, angry that she’d allowed herself a fleeting memory, she hung her coat up on the back of the door and sat on the bed which creaked and gave way under her. Megan looked out of the window and rubbed her neck, easing her aching muscles that had been tense for so long. She was safe, no-one knew she was here, they were all safe.
The landlady, Mrs Lane, had seemed somewhat nosey earlier when Megan had explained that she didn’t know how long she’d be staying, but had seemed happy to accept payment for three nights. Thankfully Megan had had some cash in her rather worn purse and so was able to book in under a false name, not having to show her real one on a credit card. She really wasn’t ready to be found, not even close so it was important that a gossiping landlady didn’t know anything. Mrs Lane had explained that breakfast was served between 8am and 10am and had recommended a local pub for dinner. Not that Megan was hungry, she rarely was these days and had become gaunt and looked pale. Her physical appearance epitomising the weakness of her mental state. For her brain also seemed pale and was not functioning as it should. It didn’t have what it needed to work. Megan thought of it as something that was broken, that needing fixing, but couldn’t seem to mend it herself.
She reached into her coat pocket and once again twiddled the coin between her fingers. Heads. Tails. Heads. ‘What if it had been tails?’ She thought. ‘Would I still be here, would any of this have happened?’ Shaking that thought off, Megan knew she’d never know the answer to that question. Clutching the coin tightly, she lay down, closed her eyes, and uncomfortably drifted into another restless sleep.
Identity: In psychology and sociology, identity is a person’s conception and expression of their individuality or group affiliations (such as national identity and cultural identity). The concept is given a great deal of attention in social psychology and is important in place identity.
Recently I had the pleasure of meeting the lovely Pippa from Story of Mum. at Britmums Live. She was very busy at the front of the venue taking photos of us mums for her website. If you havent already heard about it, this is what her wonderful website and this blog post is all about…
As mothers, it’s not often that we feel seen, heard and valued. Yet our everyday stories matter, and sharing them can inspire others. Story of Mum: Mums making an exhibition of ourselves is a touring programme of exhibitions and events in galleries and online that aims to put mothers in the spotlight.
The exhibition celebrates motherhood, explores the impact of mothering on our identities, and encourages mums worldwide to share their stories in words, photos, collage and film.
Find out more at http://www.storyofmum.com/exhibition.
Parallel to the real life events, a virtual exhibition is travelling round the world, stopping for mini exhibitions on blogs – like this one!
Participants are asked to choose one item from the existing exhibition, create one item to add to the exhibition, and share their thoughts on these and their identity in motherhood.
And without further ado…here is my exhibition!
I Curated This
What a choice of things to curate! I have spent hours looking through the website and much as I had a wonderful time looking at all of the creations so far, choosing one for my post was incredibly difficult! I got lost in the memorable moment of mum section for quite a while and wanted to curate everybody, such wonderfully moving posts! In the end I settled on a beautiful video from Stephanie at Storybramble.com from the My Mum-Story. She said in her post that she found it incredibly hard to choose just ten photos to capture her story as a mum and I completely understand how difficult this must’ve been, but the photos she has chosen are amazing and she narrates the video beautifully. You must watch her amazing video here.
I Created This
I decided to make my creation from the Mama Mash-Up section, as I guess that since becoming a mum my identity has been a bit mashed up! At first, as indecisive as ever, I chopped up 6 different pictures that I felt represented my identity as a mum. Two of them were pictures of my favourite quotations, one was a picture of my children, one a picture of my family and close friends and the other two photos were pieces of artwork I had made.
But finally, I followed the instructions (for I always get there in the end!) and created this masterpiece for the exhibition from a photo of my children, and a painting I did of some flowers I bought. I’ve entitled it Creations and Creativity.
I love it, and it’s like me…not quite perfect and a bit fragile (couldn’t find any glue to stick it all together!) yet it works! I love that I have created three beautiful children…and that I can still be creative.